12/420
While showering high I realized that my sense of independence was somewhat of an illusion. I had considered myself to be an individual who values and practices self-reliance — I worked to pay my bills; I didn’t call my parents to schedule my hair appointments; I could fry an egg without burning it; etc. But then I thought back to a recent conversation/semi-argument I had while I was home with my mom. I have this little thing wrong with my wrist and she wanted me to come home to see a doctor who has only a small window available for appointments. I refused to see him because it meant I would have to take off from work, so I told her I would just see someone near me. This brought us to an exchange where she told me that after the procedure I wouldn’t be capable of getting home on my own. I told her I could manage getting back myself. It’s for my hand so even if I was out of it I could still take the subway or, if truly necessary, a cab. She replied though that I couldn’t, because when she had something similar done she had to be released to someone. For once I didn’t have an answer, so I just answered that I would pay a bum.
I couldn’t conceive of the possibility that it was necessary for me to rely on my mom because the truth is that today our family is no longer essential in our survival. The role of family has completely changed. We no longer need to get married and pray to have a fuck-load of kids to have more pairs of hands to help around the house and to take us in when we get old. Having a large family huddled under one roof was of vital importance because there was so much to get done. Now our parents give us the tools to grow-up and create a life for ourselves where we see members of our family as people that we can rely on for emotional support, but not a whole lot else. I realized that the reason that this is no longer the case because now instead of preparing dinner for 5 hours using the animals from out back, I can now microwave one in three minutes that I picked on my way home from work.
It occurred to me then that as a whole society’s dependence has shifted from family/friends to strangers. Instead of all the women in the household gathering together to prepare breakfast we just employ Aunt Jemima to do the work for us. When it comes down to it I can get to the doctor myself, but only because I’m depending on a faceless subway conductor instead of my own mother.
- Hot Pocket
